“His second wife was a wicked, plotting woman, and a cruel stepmother…” (Shakespeare)
That’s what every woman dreams of being, isn’t it–wicked, plotting, cruel and a stepmother to boot? Truthfully, I can’t comprehend anyone desiring to become wicked, plotting or cruel, but for an increasing number of women, however, the ‘stepmother’ part does become reality.
I entered into my step-parenting adventure with previous experience (20 years as a wife, 18 years as a mother) under my belt. I’m not saying I thought the experience would be a piece of cake, but I also wasn’t expecting a huge challenge despite all I’d been told and the counseling I had received. I guess I felt confident in my parenting style and abilities; I like people and can communicate with others; and I strive to live with optimism and gratitude…so how hard could it be?
Sometimes a little like trifle.
Sometimes more like pineapple upside down cake.
Or even sometimes like the time I baked and decorated a cake, laboring into the wee hours of the night to make it perfect, and slipped as I was putting it on high on a shelf and splattered the WHOLE THING down the front of the fridge and onto the floor!
But you learn. You apologize. You begin again. You carry on. And thank goodness kids are so forgiving! My dad always told me, “Everything your mother and I have done we have done out of love for you. But we’ve never been parents before, so we’re bound to make mistakes. Please forgive us.”
Ditto for step-parenting. Not only have you never done it before, if you’re like me, you never imagined you’d ever be doing it at all!
It makes for some adventures.
“One man alone can be pretty dumb sometimes, but for real bona fide stupidity, there ain’t nothin’ can beat teamwork.” (Edward Abbey)