I arrived “home.” My spouse met me in the back yard, handed me a phone, told me it was his attorney, and that his attorney wanted to speak with me.
I took the phone, put it to my ear, the attorney introduced himself and said, “Andrea, I know we haven’t met yet, but I am so sorry for the day you must be having. I can’t imagine what you must be thinking and how you must be feeling. I am so sorry for the circumstances that led to this day for you and your children. And I’m sorry for the many days ahead.”
I don’t know what I expected from an attorney. I’d never spoken to one, professionally, before. But I didn’t expect him to be so kind to me, yet at the same time, I was completely distrustful. I didn’t know who or what to believe any more. The kind tone of his voice made me begin to cry. Again.
I asked, through my tears, “How do I know you’re telling me the truth? How do I know you are who you say you are? How do I know you aren’t involved in all of this and that this is not just another deception for my benefit? How can I believe anything you say?”
He told me he could understand why I felt that way and all he could do was assure me he had never met or heard of my spouse until two days earlier, when my spouse had walked into the attorney’s legal office and confessed what He had done.
I wish I were a better writer. I wish I had the capability to express how scared I was; how alone I felt; and how it felt to turn to a literal stranger on the phone. But I didn’t know what else to do. I didn’t know who to trust or even who to turn to for help. I felt like a fugutive. And I needed someone to tell me what to do.
“What do I do now?” I asked.
He told me I needed to hire an attorney. I, who had never cheated in school; I, who had never stolen so much as a grape from the grocery store without paying for it; I, who had always tried to live a life of complete and total integrity; I, who wouldn’t even let myself indulge in “white lies” needed an attorney? I couldn’t comprehend it. I could not believe the position I was in through no fault or action of my own. And it scared me.
But his next words terrified me.
“And whatever you do, don’t go near a bank. Don’t touch any of your bank accounts. Don’t try to access any money!” he warned.
Don’t you love how my one and only reaction was THE ONLY THING I should not have done? Obviously, I wasn’t cut out for a life of crime. I just don’t have the natural instinct for it. Another reason to never try sky diving.