“If you want to test your memory, try to recall what you were worrying about one year ago today.” (E. Joseph Cossman)

One year ago today I was worrying about the fact I was spending my last night as an officially married woman. The next morning was the day I drove to the courthouse, got divorced, went home and loaded my car with my suitcases, two youngest children and two dogs, and drove to Utah.

One year ago today I cried myself to sleep (not that I was able to sleep much.)

One year ago today I was worrying and wondering about creating a new life and rebuilding a new existence for my children and I. I worried about how I was going to do that, and I wondered how it was all going to work out. I struggled to comprehend what the new and unexpected life could possibly turn out to be.

July 12, 2009.

A day and a night of worry and burdens heavier than I ever imagined I would bear and pain I didn’t know how I was going to live through.

That’s what I was worrying about one year ago today.

But pain and enduring in spite of it is an interesting thing. “Pain is temporary. It may last a minute, or an hour, or a day, or a year, but eventually it will subside and something else will take its place. If I quit, however, it lasts forever.” (Lance Armstrong)

I am so glad I didn’t quit last year when the going was SO rough. I am so grateful that somehow I kept pressing forward. Because the pain is gone.

July 12, 2010.

Today, I’m not worrying about anything.